Since I finally have my shiny Thanks President Obama! Health Insurance card, I’ve been going to see All The Doctors. I was really fortunate to find a great local doc who is a conventional MD and also a naturopathic doctor.
I like his “let’s treat the body like the interconnected series of systems that it is and not like disassociated parts without a person attached” thinking. Even if it means that I’ll be spending the next unspecified number of months eating a severely limited diet.
I know that I will be allowed to relax eventually, but I tell ya, this morning I’m looking at my lemon water (detoxifying) and my unsweetened herbal tea (just fucking depressing) and feeling like “eventually” is code for “you will never get a lovely cup of rich, creamy, honey-sweetened, locally roasted coffee ever again.”
Plus it’s the height of stone fruit season here in the Valley and he said “no peaches.”
Which is when I said, “ARE YOU HIGH?”
There are murky grey areas here. Tomato season is coming. Technically it’s a fruit. What about plantain? Plantain is basically banana and bananas aren’t allowed until Phase 3 – “maintenance” and they are listed as “limited.”
Limit plantain? Is this possible?
So. Many. Questions.
Hello, First World Problems…