“Just don’t do it.”

I wanted to say that to someone recently. I’d been throwing out great ideas to help them over a rocky place and those ideas were getting shot down faster than clay pigeons at a shooting range. I got frustrated and a little angry. I began to feel like I was really wasting my time and my good ideas. I wanted to snap, “Fine. Just don’t do it.” and huff off in irritation. Oh my gosh here I was, handing this person my precious wisdom for free, and they were refusing to take it. What a blow to my ego!

Well that’s another post for another day, the ego thing. It was a good reality check for me about getting off the high horse I was sitting on. Still, it got me thinking.

Here’s the thing, no high horse, no ego, just what I’m feeling to be true. In the world of small business, of DIY, of making and selling your creations and putting yourself out there in the world, ain’t nobody gonna make you do anything you don’t wanna do.

Great thing about being your own boss is that you don’t have to if you don’t want to.

The other side of that coin is that if you don’t show up and do the work, then you don’t get to sit back and expect that you will manifest rewards.

If you don’t try, you will never make it.

If you don’t take risks you will never surprise yourself or grow.

If you don’t get your head out of your arse and take a look around sometimes, you will just stay stuck in the darkness.

So maybe just… do it?

This is what it looks like for me. When there’s something I don’t know how to do and I am feeling resistant to it, I try asking myself where that resistance is coming from. Usually it is fear. Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of not being able to learn or of doing it badly in front of an audience, naked and in high heels. Fear of looking like a huge failing thing that just failed. Again. For like, the umpteenth time.

If I start wanting to cry and throw things and my overwhelming desire is to have a tantrum? Then darn tootin, I know it is fear. Horrible, paralyzing fear. 
But here is the other thing I know. Fear can be overcome. It’s a lot like plugging your nose and jumping into the deep end of the pool. It is a leap of faith. Faith in yourself, faith in the water’s ability to hold you up off the bottom, faith.

Pull up your Big Girl Panties, stop your whining, stop telling yourself your sad story about why you can’t (it’s a great story, you totally wrote it beautifully, but take my word for it, it’s getting in your way) and do whatever the big scary thing is.

Because if you walk around shutting doors to possibilities, saying, “That’s not my thing.” and “I don’t like doing that so I won’t bother.” and “I’m not good enough to do that.” and constantly shooting down the ideas you are offered to help you make things work, then what you end up with is a lot of closed doors. And there you are, stuck on the wrong side of the door.

Guess what? Here’s the really cool thing. You’re not really stuck. Those doors? They aren’t locked. You can always change your mind. Also, you’re not a cat and you have thumbs.

Open them.

Make it your thing.

Bother.

Get good enough.

You can totally just do that. It’s not easy, but it’s simple. Just. Do. It. I have so much faith in your ability to open doors, say yes, and make things happen for yourself.

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About Maia Rainwood

Owner and Maker at Maia Rainwood Design. Wearable art for wise women, birth keepers, witches, and world-builders.
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8 Responses to “Just don’t do it.”

  1. cavalaxis says:

    I really, really needed to hear this right now.

    In fact, I’m leaving it open in the browser so it’s the very first thing I see in the morning.

  2. Owl says:

    And when the train derails? Because you know it will, sometime – check for injuries, say that prayer of thanks, unload that puppy and shove her back on the tracks because the dusty side of the road is nowhere near as interesting or worthy of your energy as what’s ahead.

    Woot! Woot! All aboard!

    (Obviously spending entirely too much time stuck indoors with a Thomas the Tank Engine/Star Wars obsessed six year old. If I hear him blame the Dark Side of the Force for why he can’t do what I told him to do, ONE MORE TIME…)

    I’m so proud of you, Rain. ❤

  3. Paul Hood says:

    Really good. I’m sharing this.

  4. Phoe says:

    Oh man, I needed this and didn’t even know it. You rock.

  5. Yep. Right in one.

    One of the reasons I called my business Figart Consulting is to give me that flexibility to change course. I figured I’d make most of my money as a virtual assistant, mebbe a little writing.

    To my great surprise, I’ve made almost NO money as a VA, quite a bit as a writer, but MOST of it teaching — something I’d not considered doing before an opportunity got dumped in my lap. (And yes, it terrified me).

  6. YEP YEP YEP YEP YEP YEP YEP you seddit. May i pleez share this with two dear, dear ones who are going struggling with this right now? I just went thru a long, long Tunnel of No over the past year and damn if it don’t feel better to come out into the light again… the oddest bit is how *quiet* it is when the thundering NO stops, and how simple and clear and do-able almost everything turns out to be. Gosh! Bless you and thank you.
    xoXOxoXOxo, Trixie

  7. Jules says:

    “If I start wanting to cry and throw things and my overwhelming desire is to have a tantrum? Then darn tootin, I know it is fear.” Wow–this just answered a comment I wanted to leave my Anthro lab professor (but didn’t)–I wanted to say, “this class got me right to the edge of whining out loud, ‘but I can’t!’ ” and now I can see where there emotion/frustration was coming from.
    Thank you.

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