I took naked pictures today.
Like. Really naked.
Sure, there were artfully draped bits of robe or fabric? And it was totally art, not porn. I mean, they weren’t naughty (seriously Mom, don’t worry) just naked. For art. It was a class project that a friend of mine had and he needed a model and I thought… why not? So he came over to Casa Fabulous with his lights and his reflectors and his meters and gadgets and I took off my knickers and we commenced with the art.
Holy shit y’all, I was bare arse naked in front of a camera.
And it was awesome.
And it was terrifying.
And I had to be talked down from the ledge at least twice before he showed up
And I almost cancelled because of fear.
And I’m so glad I didn’t.
I wanted to have some pithy, hysterically funny post about posing naked in front of a camera, but honestly, I’m just so filled with “holy shit I can’t believe how great that was.” that there’s no self-deprecating commentary at all. For once. No self-deprecating, self-loathing, self-annihilating commentary about my body to be heard.
So ya know? G-d bless naked pictures!
No, they will not wind up on the internet. But just in case, does this mean I can’t run for public office or Miss America, now?
Are they going to revoke my tznius card? I mean… my head totally wasn’t covered for these pictures.